This has to be short because I am pathetically tired after my first real day of anything academic, but I'm forcing myself to write because 1) I do actually enjoy it and 2) I don't want to get in the habit of putting it off. Today was indeed my first official day. Kind of. I'm taking part in a workshop on functional magnetic resonance imaging (fmri), something I have very little experience with, but a considerable amount of interest in. I was for sure the youngest and least experienced person there, which is simultaneously overwhelming and relieving. I kind of feel like it's okay that this is all going way over my head because I'm just a lowly first year grad student. I can't really be expected to understand all the jargon and programming details, can I? Then again, it is a little scary seeing the breadth and depth of stuff I will hopefully be familiar with in just a few short years. The day consisted of 3 lectures in the morning (I'll admit it, I was dozing a wee bit by the third one. Perhaps coffee is in my forecast tomorrow), and then two workshops. One of which I followed decently well (super cool imaging program called Slicer, for any of my nerdy friends) and the other, during which I got lost about half way through and spent the rest of the time just trying to fake it till I made it. All in all, I survived. And felt a little grown up in the process.
However, I have to admit this morning was not the perfect morning for my epic appearance on the graduate school scene. Here is approximately how my continuous 3rd person pep talk went...all in my head of course. (I'm "graduate student", in case that's not clear)
Well graduate student, here you are. Setting off for your first big day. In a nice shirt...and gym shorts. That's ok, you look super cool. Thank goodness the rain has stopped just in time for you to ride your bike. You forgot to grab your seat cover? Well you'll have a wet butt, so good thing you are going to change into your jeans when you get there. Just don't ride too fast, otherwise you'll get all sweaty and out of breath and you'll look silly for the rest of the day. You know everyone will judge you if your makeup smudges and your hair is a little frizzy.
Ok, you're half way there. You realize you are taking the least efficient route to get there, right? Why on earth did you just ride in front of the hospital instead of crossing at that light? You should know this area better. It's ok, just smile, grad student, and everyone will think you know what you are doing. They have no idea that you don't have a clue and that you feel ridiculous.
You made it to the right building and your bike is locked up, great! Wait...how about you do that again and actually lock it to the post this time, eh? That'd be helpful. (Opps)
Nice work walking up those stairs that went who knows where, you smartypants, and even better job walking back down them and standing there awkwardly until someone else "neuro-y" walked by so you could follow them up to the room. They have no idea you almost went the wrong way...3 times!
At least you've made it to the right room. Oh no! Everyone is wearing khakis or nice pants. Crap!! Feeling a little silly in your jeans now, aren't you? Well, at least the men aren't wearing ties.
Okay...you can relax now, nervous grad student. You've made it to the workshop, you have a name tag, you have a computer to sit at and...lo and behold...someone else is wearing jeans too :)
So that really was my train of thought this morning as I did pretty much everything wrong before finally making it successfully to the right place. I guess the whole nervous thing is to be expected and honestly, I doubt anyone else noticed any of my little mistakes (except that janitor who chuckled when I walked up the stairs...and promptly back down them). Overall I have to say the day could've gone much worse :)
I better get to sleep now so tomorrow's lectures get a little more attention from me then the ones today did. Let's all hope for some more adventures tomorrow...otherwise what am I going to ramble on here about? Goodnight.
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